Ever wondered how your account of your day compares to your toddler’s? Wonder no more…
What you say: My toddler is really interested in farm animals – particularly the porcine variety – so today we watched a special programme about them. It also touched on family values and sibling relationships, so it was really educational.
Toddler translation: I watched so many Peppa Pigs! Mummy had a lie down on the sofa and closed her eyes. She said she was asleep but she kept putting more Peppa Pigs on and saying ‘who makes a cartoon that only lasts 5 minutes?’
What you say: Today we went back to nature and breathed some fresh, country air. We splashed in puddles, saw all sorts of wildlife, and felt like we had the great outdoors all to ourselves!
Toddler translation: Mummy said I CAN’T STAY IN THIS HOUSE ALL DAY AGAIN and we all put our coats on and walked to the park at the end of our road. Nobody else was there, maybe because it was raining so bad. My feet are still wet.
What you say: Today we had a lovely picnic. I think it’s nice to break away from the schedule and do something informal sometimes – I think parenting is all about being spontaneous.
Toddler translation: Mummy said there was so much junk on the table we could eat on the floor! So we had a special picnic on the rug. We had pizza straight from the box because there was so much washing up to do and it was really great.
What you say: Today we baked home-made treats together. I chose a recipe that was low on sugar, and made sure it included plenty of nutrients for my growing children.
Toddler translation: We’d run out of Haribo Tangfastic and mummy needed something sweet to wake her up so we made banana cake out of the mouldy bananas – which was all of them! From now on I think I will only eat bananas when they are in cake.
What you say: Today we took lots of photographs for daddy so that he could feel more included in our day. The kids called him and told him all about what they’d been up to – he loves knowing what they’re doing and I think it’s a shame for him to miss out.
Toddler translation: I called daddy on the phone TWENTY TIMES! Mummy said if I kept calling him maybe he would actually come home at a decent time. After about ten times his phone went off so mummy said I could leave him loads of messages! I sung him all the nursery rhymes in my book.
What you say: Today we did arts and crafts all morning – we put our aprons on, set up the craft table and made models of all our favourite things. It was lovely. A real bonding experience.
Toddler translation: I stuck some Play-Doh up my nose and mummy got it out with the eyebrow pinchers. It hurt a bit but mummy gave me a treat because she was happy that we didn’t have to go to somewhere called Ayanee.
What you say: Today we learned all about Australia. I think it’s really important for my children to have an understanding of other countries and cultures.
Toddler translation: I watched Boj on CBeebies all morning! Mummy recorded about a hundred of them. I think she likes it because an old man called Jason Donovan does the voice, and he is something called a hunky.
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